Saturday, May 29, 2010

Ah, Merlot. The Wal-Mart of Wines.


So, Kirsten and I decided we've finally finished with our most recent fast-food binge, and we're going to move back to cooking more of our own meals. Our most recent food trends have had a lot to do with Kirsten being sick for basically the last two and a half weeks, but she's getting better, so our diet is, too.

Side note: Despite how badly Kirsten thinks we've been eating, I still have yet to try the Jesus of hamburgers. Shame.

Anyway, we're easing back into the whole cook-for-ourselves thing, starting tonight with a Bertolli skillet meal. I was pretty much cool with the instructions ("Pour into frying pan. Heat. Eat. Dumbass"), until I saw at the end: "Suggested wine pairing: Merlot."

Wait...what? Suggested wine pairings? On an idiot dinner? Really?

Yes, really. Apparently, Bertolli has started putting suggested wine pairings on all of its "Classic meals." If you like frying your scampi, you might also like a nice Chardonnay.

Of course, none of this speaks to what the best drink pairing for ramen would be. Probably the champagne of beers.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Do This Eight More Times and I'll Officially be a Handyman


So, I gained a series of great new skills today.

As part of my efforts to do minor rehabbing on the house to make it more valuable when we re-sell it, I spent a few hours today Dry-Lok'ing the basement where the old Dry-Lok had flaked away (my realtor said it would be a good way to make it seem as if tehre's no moisture problem in the basement - there isn't, but we need to make it seem like there isn't, too).

So this has been my chance to re-learn the skills necessary to apply a heavy petroleum-distillate sealant to a basement wall. And, in addition to practicing already-gained skills, I've learned a good deal more than I knew before.

For example, I have learned that the previous coat of sealant was applied to a layer of cement that had been applied over the stacked masonry foundation. But this means that the adhesive capabilities of the Dry-Lok would be affected if, say, the cement wasn't sound. Like, what if it had too much sand? Then the Dry-Lok would not stick well. And it would flake off.

What this would also mean is that applying the next layer of Dry-Lok would be impossible unless one were to scrape off the entire layer of cement that coated the masonry. And Homey don't play that.

So I have now also learned that Dry-Lok has a variety of adhesive properties:
1. After 10 seconds, it is thick enough to be self-adhesive.
2. After 20 seconds, it is tacky enough to resist gravity.
3. After 40 seconds, it is dry enough to be self-supportively adhesive.
4. After 2 minutes, it is dry enough to be supportive of other structures, like additional coats of Dry-Lok.

The problem is finding a way to get the stuff to stay on a vertical wall long enough to hold on to itself. I wonder if I can somehow mount the house to an axis to turn spin the whole thing around its center?

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

A Long Time Coming


So it's been slightly over three weeks since I last made a post to this weblog. I don't know that I've ever gone that long without a post. I may have, but that doesn't mean I know about it.

But that doesn't mean that nothing's happened.

Firstly, we've moved. We're listing our house as soon as the realtors come by and we sign the agent agreement this weekend. There are still some minor fixups to make - repainting the ceiling in the living room, patching up the Dry-Lok in the basement, that sort of thing. And of course, we're listing our house for far more than it's worth (don't tell anyone).

Or are we?

When we bought the house, we paid for what we thought was 1427 square feet - at the time (2006), when the real estate market was ridiculously overpriced, houses were sold based on really shoddy assessment practices. Among other things, rooms below grade (even garden-level rooms, or the lower levels of split-level houses) shouldn't be counted in a house's square footage.

In our case, it was. According to the city assessor's office, our house is a pathetic 977 square feet in size, even though it's got a gigantic finished lower room.

Right now houses in our market are selling from anywhere between 50 and 100 dollars per square foot. At our desired listing price, $110,000, we're asking about 120 dollars per square foot - or, more accurately, per per official square foot. When we go with the unofficial size, it's closer to 70 dollars per square foot, right smack dab in the range of prices.

But we're getting rid of that problem - which is good. A positive step, in fact. We're living in the county now, which means we don't pay city income tax. And we're in a place that is surrounded by trees, nature, birdies, and girlies 'round the pool.

Bonus reason to live here: it's a slightly shorter trip to work on the bus and train. Everyone wins!