I have nothing clever or witty to say before them...
So let's get straight to the picks!

-Arizona at Pittsburgh: Arizona has gotten pretty lucky the last two weeks, playing teams that really weren't on their best behavior. The Steelers get their feet back today. Steelers

-Atlanta at N.Y. Giants: This really is an easy pick, because the Falcons really are an easy win. I hope Dan Reeves keeps his job after this year, because he really is a good guy, but having a team fall apart because of one player is a sign of a bad GM and a bad coaching staff. Giants

-Chicago at Detroit: Every year, these teams play each other twice. Every year, the NFL's TV ratings sag in Chicago and Detroit. Bears

-Cleveland at Kansas City: You can't stop Priest Holmes, you can only hope to contain him. Unless you're the Cleveland Browns, at which point you can only hope he doesn't hurt you so much that you can't make it back to the airport for the long flight home. Great Googly Moogly, it's the Chiefs in a blowout

-Houston at Cincinnati: I think (hope) Houtston is overrated. Bengals

-Indianapolis at Jacksonville: Byron Leftwich still has the dropsies, with 14 fumbles over the last three weeks. This is a statistic that is integral to the understanding of the game, and we all know what that means. Colts

-Miami at Tennessee: Brian Griese has had some good performances the last two weeks, but really, the offensive line is a big problem in Miami. You know that if you're calling on Richmond Webb, you've got some issues. Titans

-Seattle at Washington: The Redskins players know they're fighting for Steve Spurrier's job, and that's a crying shame: nobody should ever be willing to play for him under any circumstances. But no matter, the Redskins will win in my Upset Special. Redskins

-Tampa Bay at Carolina: Some pundits are actually taking the Buccaneers' win-one-lose-one pattern this season seriously. I say they're retarded, because that means the Bucs would win, which won't happen - Panthers

-Minnesota at San Diego: Another day, another blowout. Drew Brees, Doug Flutie, it doesn't matter. When your team gives up its two best defensive starters, and when you have nothing behind them, you will be fighting for the number one draft choice. Vikings

-Buffalo at Dallas: Gregg Williams, when he was hired, was cast as a guy who was very thorough and methodical, a guy who had everything planned out. What happened? Cowboys

-N.Y. Jets at Oakland: Both of these teams are 2-6, and both are coming off of losses. The problem is that the Raiders are a bad, whereas the Jets are a good 2-6. Jets

-Baltimore at St. Louis: I like Kyle Boller, and he's shown the signs of greatness that mean he could be an above-average QB some day. But the Rams, when they fire on all cylinders, are a very good football team. The Ravens, when they fire on all cylinders, are still a team from the AFC North. Rams

-Philadelphia at Green Bay: Wow! Two weeks in a row, the NFL managed to schedule an MNF game that didn't suck. This must be a sign that the planets are aligned, and the world will soon come to an end. The problem is, they still have that idiot musical competition during halftime. WTF? Green Bay