Why I Want to be a Good Father
People often say that pregnancy is the most beautiful time in a woman's life. This is a LIE. She is uncomfortable, she is in pain, she has digestive upset that would make a bad comedy writer blush, she gets arm hair. The headaches never stop. The back pain is cinematic in its aspirations.
Things swell, and change color, and generally look different. She gains this olfactory sense that rivals that of a drug dog, and every foul thing she smells she blames on the man in her life. Then there's this day-long process of pushing a pot roast through a space that is, by and large, the size of a grape.
I just hope this daughter of ours is worth it, for her sake.
I want to be a good father because I don't want to have the desire to have another kid in the future because this one ends up screwed up - I don't know if I can willingly put Kirsten through this again. At least, not until they find a better way to treat the pain sensitivity that is part and parcel of having depression.
Interesting factoid: an inability to cope normally with pain is a diagnostic symptom of major depression.
Anyway, I love my wife. Seeing how hard this whole reproduction process is on her makes me wonder why people tried having sex after they discovered what came of it.
2 Comments:
Aw! I'm really glad that Kirsten has you. I admire you for being so open and honest about your feelings for her and about this. And, I'm sure that Lorelai is going to be a wonderful person. And, I'm also sure that you two are going to do a fantastic job of raising her.
The pain caused by her pregnancy will be over soon and, as I've read, she'll release endorphins when she's going through labor that should at least diminish the pain a bit. I can't even imagine how painful this all is for her and that's one of the reasons why I have so much respect for her strength and bravery.
I know it's going to seem weird but, as someone who cares immensely for Kirsten, I want to say thank you for taking care of her. You're amazing. You both are.
Yeah, I'm pretty freakin' sweet.
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