Fun with translators
Alright, I have to admit that I blame this post entirely on Chris and his goldarned badger post that he got from someone else.

Here's the link to the badgers, mushrooms, and snakes, if you haven't already seen them.

So someone on mikebrownsucks.com posted a silly flash song, and I responded with the "Big Guns," as I called them. The Badger "song." I used a close approximation of Chris's description of it. He called it, "A Treatise on Badgers and Their Interactions With Mushrooms and Snakes in Their Natural Habitats." I believe that I called it, "a treatise on badgers and their interaction with fungi and predators in their natural environment." Close enough that it's considered plagiarism if I don't credit Chris with the idea of how to word it. So that was Chris's work. Good job.

(See the whole MBS thread on the subject here.)

Now that that's out of the way, badgers have come up several times on the message board, all with negative connotations. At one point, I posted something like, "If that link leads to badgers or porn, I'm going to be pissed," to which another poster replied, "Check out http://www.badgerporn.com/mikebrown" Great...a 70-year-old loser of an NFL owner with badgers. Just what I need to finish off my monday.

But that got me to thinking, for some reason, about complaining about the lack of both badgers and porn at that website. The website doesn't exist, by the way. I tried.

So I opted to swear at him in Spanish. And then I really got to "thinking."

What happens if I run my post through a Systran translator, like babelfish, multiple times in a strange language? I know! Korean!

What follows is perhaps the funniest thing to come out of Altavista in a long time, and they don't even know it.

The English equivalent of what I posted
Where are the badgers? They are not there! And there are no naked girls either? Shit.
English-->Korean-->English
There is a Badger to where? From that place there are not them,! And from that place nakedness is the girl is which piece? Human waste. I have no idea where that badger is headed, but I reckon you better get on it an' get outta Dodge, mister.
English-->Korean-->English
From that place does the Badger happen in the place? From that place them,! The naked body girl which formation of a cabinet peels from that place and it happens it happens? Human being superannuation water. Cabinet? Annuation?
English-->Korean-->English
It does inside the place where it happens the Badger from that place? From that place them,! The formation of the market peels the body girl who is naked and it happening from that place and happening? Human being old adjacent waters. That's right, you let those old adjacent waters know who's boss.
English-->Korean-->yada yada yada
It in the place the Badger happens from that place and me it does on place internal? From that place them,! Place and it happens in formation me of market from to happen and I it it is naked peel the body girl? The human being long becomes and the adjacent waters which is contiguous.
English-->Korean-->English, one more time to keep the giggles coming!
Inside place it the Badger happens from that place and the B which it does in inside place? From that place them happening inside formation,! From me of place and it market it happens and it nakedness of the I is the shell body girl it happens? The human being which is contiguous becomes the adjacent waters which is contiguous for a long time. I hope I never become the ajdacent waters which is contiguous for a long time.

I have to admit I'm very curious as to where in the world those capital letters came from. They weren't in there at all to start with. But you want to know the best part? That's not how it translated it at all the first time.

So, in a roundabout way, the Chris Hill Festival has taught us all a valuable lesson: the Korean language is not meant to interact with badgers.