Oh crap, it's almost noon!
Here are the week 5 picks, released at the same time that the Fox NFL countdown guys release theirs. So I don't want anyone telling me these are "late."

Arizona at Dallas, 1:00 pm: Bill Parcells has done a wonder with the Cowboys. How, I don't know. But they're gonna win. DAL

Cincinnati at Buffalo, 1:00 pm: How can I say what I'm about to say? As a Bengals fan, I deserve to be beaten. But I think the Bills need this game more. Perhaps they'll play too tight and get all stupid and stuff, but I don't think so. Mad props to Marvin Lewis, but really, the Bills are the better team. BUF

Denver at Kansas City, 1:00 pm: A tilt between two high-powered offenses, and Jake Plummer has to lose sometime. KC

Miami at N.Y. Giants, 1:00 pm: Ricky Williams is as close to a god as any person has been since Achilles. And Williams is less of a whiner. MIA

Minnesota at Atlanta, 1:00 pm: Rumor has it Falcons owner Arthur Blank is losing faith in, and patience with, Dan Reeves. I don't see why; Reeves is too good a coach to let this season go totally down the tubes with the talent level he's got. He just won't get it turned around this week. MIN

New Orleans at Carolina, 1:00 pm: Would anyone be shocked by Carolina's beating New Orleans? Didn't think so. CAR

Oakland at Chicago, 1:00 pm: As if this were a contest...OAK

Seattle at Green Bay, 1:00 pm: I hate to admit it, but Mike Holmgren's done a good job in Seattle, getting that team ready to play. The opposite has happened in Green Bay, where we see what happens when your offense is coming apart. SEA

Tennessee at New England, 1:00: pm You've got an injured quarterback who denies he's injured, a beat-up defense, and no legitimate running threat. Sounds like last year's Saints, but worse. TEN

San Diego at Jacksonville, 4:05 pm: I like Byron Leftwich, I really do. But his performance last year in my fantasy league convinced me that he ain't ready. Yet. SD

Detroit at San Francisco, 4:15 pm: I know this could, and should, be an upset by the Lions. Or would that be an upset? Both teams, it would seem, are fairly equally capable. Or rather, incapable. SFO

Washington at Philadelphia, 4:15 pm: A lot of folks are pulling for McNabb to answer Rush Limbaugh with a 7,000-yard performance today. He's a good player, but that defense is too suspect, and Patrick Ramsey has earned his team's respect. Perhaps more importantly, he's earned Berney's respect. WAS

Cleveland at Pittsburgh, 8:30 pm: Cleveland is by far the worst team in the NFL. The worst players on Jacksonville, San Diego, and New Orleans could beat them. PIT

Indianapolis at Tampa Bay, 9:00 pm This is a tough game to call. But what can I say? I like the Bucs. It's a hunch. TB